I really don't remember what I wore today. I do know that I wore my heart on my sleeve. I wore my emotions, constantly streaming tears down my face. A baby is supposed to be a happy time in a mother's life. Instead my friend is burying her child. She was born premature, so they never had a chance for a baby shower. A baby shower was recently put into plans, and now instead they are dealing with the task of planning a funeral.
I have been so emotional, I haven't wanted to do anything but sit around and cry. I was only a friend to the family, so I can't even imagine how they feel if I'm feeling this bad. I pray for this family to find comfort in the loss of this beautiful baby girl. My heart aches for them.
I took my children with me tonight and tried to go shopping for something to wear to her funeral, instead I tuned into the crazy crying lady on aisle six! I just can't control it, I can't stop thinking about it. It's constantly on my mind.
There are so many undeserving mothers in this world, mothers who abuse their children or even murder their children. Then there is my friend, someone who wants more than anything in this world to be a mother and it's just out of her grasp. I can't imagine loosing one child let alone three. She has an amazing strength, and I hope and pray that someday God will bless her with a healthy child. She deserves it more than anyone.
I hope it's a long weekend. I know I am not ready for Sunday, I know her family is not ready for Sunday. I hope and pray that I can find strength, to know all the right things to say to comfort them.
Today I wore ............tears.